How to Avoid Becoming a Road Rage Victim

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Road rage and car accidents - going together like peas and carrots

What is it with British roads that turn people into crazed lunatics as soon as they get behind the wheel?

Only this morning I was driving into work when someone cut me up on the motorway. But why did I feel the need to honk my horn, drive three feet from his rear bumper whilst simultaneously performing an obscene hand gesture? I wish I knew.

And I wish I knew why it then became a matter of honour that I overtake him before swerving back into my rightful position in front of him, all the while still gesticulating like some drunken hooligan on a football terrace instead of a supposedly well-educated and well-mannered young man in a suit and tie.

I’d never consider acting so abhorrently if someone in the supermarket pushed in front of me. I wouldn’t ram them with my trolley, scream insults, chuck bean cans at them and then force my way back ahead, still pointing and gesturing like a demented psychopath. And if I did I’d probably get a clip around the ear before being carted off by security and arrested.

So why do I do it when I’m behind the wheel and cocooned in my car? Maybe it’s because of that, the caged in thing. I’m safe there in my little metal box. Nobody can touch me. The fact that I’m flying along at 60mph, inches from someone else’s back end, so consumed with rage that I’m not exactly concentrating on the road doesn’t seem to enter my head. Talk about asking for a car accident.

But that’s exactly it. I’m not safe simply because I’m inside my car; far from it. Not only am I increasing my chances of a road accident by becoming enraged, driving like a loon and not concentrating properly, but the chances are that I could become the victim of someone who takes it all to a whole new level.

Shouting, swearing and tailgating someone is bad enough but there are people out there who feel the need to get a bit closer to the person that’s just ‘dissed’ them on the road. Probably the most famous example of such behaviour was demonstrated by the infamous Kenneth Noye back in 1996 when he stabbed and killed a fellow motorist who had wound him up on the M25. That things can go so far is absolutely ridiculous; one man’s life wiped out in an instant for no other reason than he swerved in front of someone else on the motorway.

I’ve never actually wanted to physically kill someone, no matter what heinous crime of the road they’ve committed. I may have wanted them to know how angry I am and how much of a bad driver they are, and I might just have secretly hoped that they get pulled over by the police around the next bend for speeding. But actually dragging them out of their car and slaughtering them at the roadside has never seriously crossed my mind.

The psychologists have started to take an interest in road rage and numerous studies and books have been published trying to explain the phenomenon. There have been hundreds of conflicting opinions concerning the reasons for it but it is now generally agreed that the problem is caused by a syndrome known as intermittent explosive disorder (IED).

Apparently 16 million Americans suffer from IED and it is defined as a ‘disorder of the brain characterized by explosive outbursts of behaviour that are disproportional to the provocation.’

Basically, as far as I can see, that means being unable to control oneself. Or maybe I’m just being unsympathetic.

It seems it can take place anywhere and can be fuelled by a whole host of different circumstances but it is the car that provides a fertile ground for it to fester and then boil into an eruption of furious and unstoppable anger.

There has been medication prescribed to people who use it to justify their outrageous behaviour and counselling is also available for those whose lives it impacts upon. For the rest of us, however, we just need to take a deep breath and realise that it’s not worth getting worked up if someone cuts us up or drives too close to our rear bumper.

You don’t know who they are, you’re likely to never see them again and the chances are that if they carry on driving like that then they’ll end up being involved in a car crash. And who’s the winner then?

Maybe I should take note and maybe you should too. Easier said than done but if stopping to think and taking that deep breath really can prevent a needless car accident then it’s got to be worth it.

As my dear old mum used to say, “Reacting just makes you as bad as them.”

And I guess, like always, she was spot on.

The Real Cause Of Road Rage

Road Rage has become one of the many topics that I have seen on several TV News Channels. Announcing that Road Rage is now new a type of mental disorder. It is important that we understand, as a society, just how this mental condition first evolved to such an aggressive state. (So that the treatment for this type of mental condition can be deterred or diminished greatly.

I have discovered that Road Rage comes from a social up-bringing in our society that first starts when we enter the public, or private school system. We learn at a very young age the basic fundamental skills which brings about Road Rage.

Children five to six years of age, are un-intentionally taught Road Rage in our schools when we first begin our education program. The children are unaware that as they grow up they are about to become carriers for this growing type of bad behavior that has claimed the lives of so many innocent people on our streets, and highways throughout the country.

This growing phenomenon is very simplex in nature, it begins when we are taught our basic forms of discipline that we first learn when we are taught to stand in long line to go eat, play, fire drills, or while standing in line so a teacher can take attendance.

We were taught as children that if we raced, pushing and shoving to the head of the line that we could have the best pick of seats in a classroom, or the first to be fed when we raced to the front of the line to eat at the school cafeteria.

For some of us we can also relate to what it was like to be the last, and how most of the good food at the school cafeteria had run out. From my own personal experience, I can state that I was not infected by this type of environmental learning conditioning, and only because I was always the one at the back of the line no matter what. So as a result I grew up to be very passive, and considerate of other people while on the road, or just standing in a long line in a grocery store, bank line, or a movie theater line in my everyday life.

I also developed a very high tolerance of being patient as result of being last. I can also recall being proud of being last one in line, only because there was no pressure to be first as I had witnessed with the other children my age as they fought and pushed to be first.

I am sure we all can relate to our own experiences when we were once in school. Remember the first time someone took cuts in a long line that you were standing in as a kid, and how you witnessed the behavior of other kids objecting to this type of action.. Do you also remember the out cry, and actions of the other kids that were in protest as this kid was let in to line by friends, or other classmates, do you also recall how the person that cut in front of another kid was punished with rude comments, or maybe you witnessed a fight break out over this incident.

This type of behavior is the beginning of our environmental mental conditioning that leads some of us to our basic, and well developed hatred of someone cutting in front of us.

All through school we are taught this form of unacceptable behavior that grows into this instinctive type of hatred. As a result, when we are old enough to drive we tend to manifest, and draw from our deep seeded childhood experiences, as we act out in the form of Road Rage. This type of behavior is triggered by one of our basic and primitive human emotions called revenge.

At the low end of this mental condition. Some children that have been exposed to small amounts of this environmental conditioning at an early age that later grow up to act out there deep seeded instinctive aggressions verbally, and maybe even with a hand signal that lets everyone around them know that they are aggravated by this type of action from being cut off in traffic.

At the high end of this growing phenomenon we can expect to see more of an aggressive, and irrational behavior in people that have had more of an exposure to this environmental conditioning.

In some cases we can expect the pushing, and shoving to be replaced by the instinct pushing, and shoving using our cars in our attempt to satisfy our basic, and primitive emotions we know as revenge. The results can be devastating to innocent bystanders who become involved in an accident that was caused be this instinctive behavior.

In other cases where street gangs that hold respect above all else, we can also expect more of a criminal behavior as some gangs act out their aggressive behavior with guns on the street when cut off in traffic, or on highways.

Having the experience of being able to identify the core of this problem associated with Road Rage, I have developed a educational training program for teachers that is an effective solution to this type of environmental conditioning that results in Road Rage, Street Gangs, as well as other mental conditions that are manifested through this type of mental conditioning in our schools.

For more information on how I can be more effective in your community please feel free to call me at 520-749-1105, or e-mail me at Smontes@scientist.com And thank you for your time.

Have You Been the Victim of a ''Rager'' Yet?

Everyone knows without explanation that the Internet is literally, the Information Super-Highway. Everyone also knows that super-highways have the highest incidences of what has been termed road rage. Road rage can happen without warning, and seemingly without provocation, as everyone, that spends any amount of time behind the wheel of a car for either business or pleasure can attest.

There seems to be an alarming trend on the Internet as well, with its Information Super Highway status and feel. As in road rage, frustrations build up as well on the Internet, as both marketers and searchers experience the same isolated, lonely, all-by-myself feelings that build up to road rage on the highways and byways of major thoroughfares. Crowds, wrong turns, congestion, time constraints, and fender benders all contribute to the problem of road rage on highways, and can contribute to net rage on the Internet. The Internet, especially in the marketing arena is becoming overcrowded.

Couple that with the feelings of isolation and frustration that many on the Internet (especially marketers with their own businesses) seem to feel, and the incidences of net rage can occur frequently, and as in road rage, unexpectedly. The fender benders of road rage can be compared to the differences in personality and opinions, as well as methods of communicating, that we will experience in our dealings with others on the net. We can clash with others without meaning to, and thus cause a fender bender that really was not our own fault. An incident of net rage is no less disturbing, or emotionally debilitating, than an incidence of road rage, as the violent, ravaged, feel of both types of incidences are quite the same.

With net rage, though, the perpetrator, due to the anonymity of the Internet, can remain more intangible, and the reasons for the rage can most times not be determined. It happens stealthily most times. You're minding your own business, taking care of business, and suddenly, you find yourself at the receiving end of vitriolic, unwarranted attacks verbally by another. They feel within their rights to tell you, in no uncertain terms, how they feel about you personally (without ever getting to know you personally).

Why does this happen? It's simple. You'll never know. It could be personal problems, business problems, financial stress, or just plain ignorance of the proper method of behavior by the individuals engaging in this. Many times, simply because of the impersonal feel of the Internet, you're just not a real person to others. As a victim, it may feel totally unjust to be singled out this way, but for the perpetrator, it feels, without a doubt, totally justified.

What can be done? Not much, unfortunately. Ignoring the behavior is best though. Let's face it, there is too much negativity in the world already. Fighting negativity with more negativity, or being on the defensive only increases the negativity on the part of the 'rager.' There are times online, when the only thing to do is to do nothing.

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Five Strategies You Can Use To Decrease Your Own Road Rage

What, has the world gone totally nuts!

There is no reason on the planet why any person should be behaving like apes from the caveman period on the road. Nobody is that important that they have the right to take another man or woman's life just because they cut you off. Sometimes someone cutting you off will happen by accident and some of our vehicle designs are much the reason for these incidents. As an owner of a Toyota Lite Ace Van, the simple design of this vehicle has led me to find many dangerous blind spots where I can effectively see out but many vehicles owners do not know blind spots even exist, so we all need to give a bit of leeway when it comes to driving cause simply due to a vehicle design can led to an accidental cut off.

Look us all make mistakes when we drive, nobody is perfect but is it really the incident of being cut off that leads to road rage or are there other underlying issues. In reality, most road rage incidents that occur are simply an outlet for other things that are going on in their life. With this being the case, whilst you are driving, you are the only one who can control YOU so it is important that you control your own road rage and to help you to do that I want to outline five strategies you can use to help you with your own road rage.

Strategy 1 - Leave Yourself Enough Travel Time

One of the biggest mistakes people make during the day is not leaving themselves enough time to travel from one appointment to another. The stress alone of running behind schedule is enough to make a persons blood boil and personally if you are running late then you should not be behind the wheel of the car. You are a danger behind the wheel to yourself and everyone else. One of the observations I have made is that anyone who is late, always wants to do 10 kilometers over the speed limit and will get really aggressive and abusive to those who want to do the speed limit.

In fact one day I was driving along, this bloke got incredibly aggressive and abusive behind me simply because he could not force me to speed. The speed limit on the road was 100 km per hour and we were in an outback area where there were no fences and cattle roaming freely. I was fortunate I was in a Toyota Landcruiser which gave me a bit of size and protection. The individual in question eventually drove his truck up next to my vehicle and tried to drive me into the creek. Fortunately being in a four wheel drive gave me the ability to go off the road and cope with this individual. In the end, the individual was stopped by the police and charged with dangerous driving as the police officer had seen the incident and clocked me doing the legal limit. I was very lucky in the end because I could have been killed that day. In turns out the whole reason the individual was getting so aggressive was that he was late to get home to his wife. Instead of taking his time the police caught up with him and he was not home for quite some time.

The moral of the story is to plan your day and plan to stay alive. If you have a full calendar of appointments to go to during a day make sure you work out how long it takes to get from one appointment to another. If you find you can not get to your next appointment on time, then simply ring the client and tell them you are on your way, apologise and drive sensibly, cause remember life is not a dress rehearsal.

Strategy 2 - Chew Gum

Whenever I used to go away with my parents when I was younger my parents would always chew gum. Could never understand why but they did. Well, a few months ago I was reading some new research on the value of gum and it actually found that a combination of chewing gum and listening to music, helped in releasing alpha waves in your brain. It is the alpha waves that are responsible for the feeling of calmness you feel, like when you whistle a happy tune.

Recently I was listening to a researcher who helps students study for their High School exams and he found that students increased their ability to learn by as much as 30% by chewing gum in combination with their studies and listening to music. We will cover more on the music issue in a moment.

Strategy 3 - Meditate Prior To Traveling

Okay, I can hear it now, "Oh Yeah Hippy, Want Us to Meditate do ya?" Absolutely! Look whilst meditation has certainly been a thing of fringe groups in western society or associated with eastern religions many researchers are now coming to the distinct conclusion that meditation can make a huge difference to our day-to-day lives and help us to overcome stress, especially while traveling. Look, why not try out meditation for just 20 minutes a day. It is a fantastic tool and when you become proficient in the art you will find that moving to a start of calm is really easy.

There are many different techniques to help you meditate and I certainly recommend meditating using Baroque music as we have found that it helps the person meditating get to that point of peace a lot quicker than other types of meditation music.

Let us face it… if you are calm prior to getting into the car, then you have a much better chance of staying calm but if you are out of sorts prior to getting into the car, then with the stress of driving all you are going to do is run the risk of doing something silly.

Strategy 4 - Play Baroque Meditation Music during Your Trip

Playing music in the car can really help you to maintain your calmness and is a great stress reliever whilst driving but be careful of what sort of music you do listen to. You can find that certain music can in fact heighten your anxieties or stress whilst traveling. Researchers have found that Baroque Meditation music at 60 beats per minute will in fact help release alpha waves in your brain and lead you to a sense of calm. Combine this strategy with that of chewing gum and you will have a much greater chance of beating road rage than without.

Strategy 5 - Have A Photo Of Your Family Visible

When fighter pilots go into battle, one of the objects they carry with them and put on the cockpit of their aircraft is a picture of their family. The reason they do that is to remember in the heat of a dog fight exactly what they are fighting for. Sometimes when they go into a really steep dive, they may loose consciousness for a few moments due to the G-forces and as they come to the photo of their loved ones jolts them back into place. Well just like the fighter pilots, I encourage all drivers to have a photo of their loved ones on the dashboard of your car.

The next time someone cuts you off and you want to run up the back of the car in front or to give them what for, simply look at the photo of your family briefly and remember what you will loose if you do something silly. Remember, if you kill someone whilst driving, you are going to go to jail. What would you do if your family lost you? Your family should be the most important thing in your life, why put them at risk.

Road Rage is a major problem on the roads today and whilst there is nothing you can do about all the other people on the road you can do something about yourself and that is where we need to start. The next time someone cuts in front of you or someone steals your car space, do not abuse them or confront them, simply feel sorry for them and move on.

To finish off I want to reiterate the five strategies that you can do to help reduce your own road rage:

Strategy 1 - Leave Yourself Enough Travel Time Strategy 2 - Chew Gum Strategy 3 - Meditate Prior To Traveling Strategy 4 - Play Baroque Meditation Music During Your Trip Strategy 5 - Have A Photo Of Your Family Visible

Chris has a Six Step Meditation Program called Relaxation Techniques for Stress Management, Baroque Meditation Music - Meditation Music and Seven Ways of Reducing Stress

Web Rage

Some people by nature are simply nasty. You can find an article almost every day in the paper about "road rage". Someone committed a grievous offense against them (like driving too slow) and they ran them off the road. An airline attendant is punched because she didn't bring someone their drink fast enough, or a clerk is abused because the store is out of a certain product.

Well folks, these same "nasties" are on the Internet and exhibit "Web Rage". Let's face it - we all receive unsolicited email (spam) trying to sell us something almost every day. The majority are "hit and run" with either a free email account that they know will be immediately closed, or a fake email address that can't be traced. They either give you a telephone number to call, or a snail mail address to write to for further information. Very seldom will you see a return email address as they know it will be shut down before the end of the day or many times it is forged.

Now the "nasties", aggravated with all the spam they get, go on a crusade, and make complaints to all the ISP's that send this junk. The ISP's dutifully accept the complaint and investigate it. Their level of frustration raises however, every time they receive word that the address was forged and the ISP can't do anything about it. So they go after anyone they can. They might even subscribe to a newsletter, forget that they did, and complain when they get it. Worse yet, they may simply "not like" an article that was in the Newsletter. Now the real "nasties", instead of merely unsubscribing, may make a formal complaint to your ISP (Internet Service Provider) that they are being spammed.

Most ISP's will investigate complaints of this nature. Many will give the person being complained about, the chance to "plead their case". Some however, will summarily shut down their account. In other words, you are deemed guilty by the ISP and they simply cancel your account. This is not only unfair, but you may have legal recourse against an ISP that does this.

When someone subscribes to my newsletter(s), it automatically triggers a response to them, thanking them for subscribing, and telling them a bit about the newsletter. They can immediately unsubscribe if they don't want to receive it. If they do choose to receive it, and then decide they don't want it, they can easily unsubscribe by simply clicking on a link at the end of the newsletter.

Recently, I had a complaint lodged against me because my email address happened to be at the end of an article I had written, (like this one) and someone had included it in their newsletter. They also filed a complaint against every email address they could find in the newsletter, including all the advertisers. Some people simply will not follow unsubscribe instructions and will summarily file a complaint.

I have seen a number of "opt in" newsletters accounts cancelled because of a complaint. But as times change, so does the attitude of the more progressive ISP's. They do not presume guilt. If you are on the "up and up", most spam complaints will be dismissed. They also realize that there are "nasties" out there and will work with you to solve the problem.

So - what can you do to protect yourself from this? Your best bet is to use a list server to send your publication. If they have to confirm that they subscribed, there is no question that you are in the clear. If you are using your own email to send it out, be sure to keep a copy of their request to subscribe.

Never use the ISP that hosts your web page to send out your newsletter. If they cancel your account, you will also lose all your web pages you have on their server.

If someone is too lazy to follow your unsubscribe instructions, make your best effort to take them off your list. If they are not on your list, and having it forwarded from another address, (usually a free email account) explain the situation and ask them to give you the address they subscribed under. While it may not solve the problem, at least they know you are trying.

There are "nasties" out there and if you are going to send out a newsletter or other bulk email, make sure you protect yourself from "Web Rage".

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